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25 Comments

  1. I’m so glad that you focused on minimizing regret. This is feels like my biggest drawback when it comes to letting go of things too quickly. I like to take time to find good homes for the things I am parting with – to maximize joy for the receivers and minimize the overwhelm going into landfills when others would be loving those items. I really like this idea of going more slowly so that there is a greater chance of not repeating the same mistakes! Thank you for your insight <3

    1. I totally agree with your method. when I focused on a blanket box and one side of a cupboard and only did that before I moved onto the next area .I felt less pressure and more satisfied and yes things were not everywhere. so easier to sort and clear . I did a couple of things per day. it was progress without the stress.

      1. I am currently de-cluttering but on a go slow method. I feel the most important aspect of de- cluttering one need to it oneself. you cannot have side comments, then the process fails. This does not demand any timelines. Less stress, not work up, have time to do other things if necessary.
        One unpack a box then one needs to reshuffle items in the cupboards to accommodate a new box. With every household items this process takes place.

      2. Decluttering a little bit at a time works.
        The whole living room is almost fully decluttered and some of the areas have stayed organized with minimal cleaning.

    2. Decluttering a little bit at a time works.
      The whole living room is almost fully decluttered and some of the areas have stayed organized with minimal cleaning.

    3. You know you have a lot of stuff when you move from a really big home, gave away rooms of stuff. Only to move into a really smaller home, and still have to much stuff.
      Some stuff after the 1st parting is so much easier.
      I’ve made my bins for donations, friends and trash.
      I have so many books still and crafts, so my idea now is read the books and give them away.
      I will take a drawer or cabinet at a time now because it’s all in the house and tightly fits. thanks for yourvideas.

  2. I am so in agreement with this! My goal is each week to toss or donate 1 large bag. At the end of the year, that is 52 bags! Some weeks I get more out and some weeks none but I am moving in the right direction! This is just so much more doable for me!

  3. I have been practicing a slow declutter for about a month. My goal is to have a neat home for summer time fun with the grandkids. I don’t want to waste time worrying about the mess, and to be able to enjoy a peaceful place of rest inside. I’m amazed at how much better I feel emotionally and mentally with a tidier home. I’ve thrown away at LEAST one large trashcan weekly and have lost count of the Goodwill trips. For the first time in ages, I’m excited about decorating my walls and creating a nice home for all to enjoy. Stress, work and other factors took the joy out of almost everything for way too long. I’ve read all the tips and tricks for decluttering methods… this is the one that’s worked best for me. Slow and steady, intentional and having a plan of attack. Great article and tips, thank you for letting us know we are not alone in this struggle! I’ll NEVER be June Cleaver, but I can be a better version of me.

  4. Thank you for this article. For a long time I have been drown in self doubt and the rate of my declutter, slow but sure, yet results are not as visible as all the speedy declutter method out there. I agree with you that it’s the journey that counts and part of me feels the process matters to me, to detach from what happen when the clutter accumulated so I can move forward properly without having to face the same type of clutter again.

    I am embark on the slow decluttering method for about a month now, discarding unwanted items, donating and recycling. I go with the pace with what feels right and rest when I need. It feels like luxury to be able to declutter this way but necessary at the same time. Thank you for your affirming tips.

  5. I am new to this idea of decluttering idea. I have had a very emotional journey these past 15 years i moved lost my husband and Mother with in 3 weeks of each other . I have always been the keeper of the family stuff there are only 3 of us now and we really don’t have the space for all of the family items . my brothers live in different cities and states now we each have our own lives ect. but I wish I had more help in doing this. my husband was my anchor and helper in figuring out what to keep and give away. he always helped me to come to terms with some things.our daughter has not wanted anything to do with me since she left home got married ect. have no real close friends who are avaliable to help me either. some days I just sit and cry, not having any plans of attack. I am trying but it’s so hard. don’t get me wrong I have let go of a lot of stuff but it’s hard to put my life in forward motion.. I am the keeper of the family tree too. I just feel so lost most days. having no direction to go. thank you for listening to my rambling still trying to do one day at a time. my house is a mess as I do not know how to really start over again. it was 40 years always taking care of everyone else. now it’s just me and my 6 kitties one has been with me for 20 plus years. others not as long . she’s my rock when feeling low.

    1. Where are you located? Your story really resonated with me as I am in a similar boat as I’ve lost all of my genetic family members in the last 2 years. I understand the “just sit and cry” that you describe and would like to help if you are near me…I live in Texas.

    2. keep the faith. Decluttering of emotions is also essential. Use social media for that wisely, as you just did.

    3. You will get there. Believe in yourself. I am an only child with both parents gone. I understand what you are saying.
      Time to learn to take care of yourself first. Do something that makes you happy or feel better. It helps.

    4. There are many ways to get help. You can hire a declutter expert who’ll you pay hourly to give guidance. There’s a support group called Clutters Anonymous: cluttersanonymous.org or .com. They have hourly decluttering session by phone on the internet and sometimes group meetings in person.

      1. Thank you so much for that helpful information!!! I feel so lonely and isolated sometimes! And overwhelmed! The emotional part is big too ! I’ve lost so much that I can’t get back!!!

    5. You have reached out and now you are not alone. You are officially in the decluttering club and we are here to support you. Fifteen years is a good chunk of time and you have been managing and making decisions. Good for you. Give yourself a pat on the back and take another step forward.

  6. It is just common sense and whatever works for you. Who can’t go thru a closet and donate? Who has to be told over and over ?

  7. I declutter weekly! The minute Insee a mess, I toss it! I also have a box by my back door that I put my goodwill items into! When it is full, I take it to the goodwill! I also have a goodwill box in my closet. If I put an item on to wear it and I don’t like it, it goes in the goodwill box!

  8. God bless you, dear “Anonymous just me and six kitties” as you take one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time. The good Lord promises He is always with us (even if we don’t feel like it). Matthew 28:20 I am with you always… What works for me some days is to tell myself “I can set a timer (for 15 minutes or maybe an hour) and just go through 5 or 10 items that bother me when I look at them every day or trip over them and put them in a donate bag by my door. Once I set the timer, maybe put on my favorite mood music, and pick up one thing in my way, I find 5 minutes was achievable, and I might do 10 more minutes before I look for an excuse to stop. Or I might keep going. And after I work for 15 minutes or an hour, I reward myself with a short walk outside or a half hour to do something else that I enjoy (reading for fun, calling someone on the phone that I never hear from but would like to say hello to and ask how THEY are doing for 15 minutes if they’re free). Make the rewards healthy, too, like dancing to a favorite song in your bedroom, or preparing a nutritious slow-cooked meal for yourself with leftovers,if you enjoy them like I do. If cooking is overwhelming, then grocery shopping at a health food store/deli for a colorful appetizing pre-assembled meal. At the end of the day, you can feel satisfied that you made a goal and met the goal. Small goals are better than no goals. 😄

  9. Anonymous, be kind to yourself. You sound like a thoughtful person who wants to make well-considered, deliberate decisions. Don’t listen to any discouraging noise, and reject mean labels. The terms “clutter” and de-cluttering” should be removed from our vocabulary; they are someone else’s judgment.
    I had foot surgery 7 weeks ago and set about organizing the contents of 15 boxes of papers that were all mixed up. Some items date to 40 or more years ago, and some of this was from my parents’ history. Sure, I have a couple of boxes’ worth to shred, and I’ve recycled even more, but I’m not throwing out my Dad’s military service records citing his 5 bronze stars! Forget about “getting rid” of anything; chances are this framework makes you feel like you are disrespecting other people and your own your history and accomplishments. As you go along, you’ll figure out what to keep and what to toss.
    I started by making a list of big-picture categories and sorting papers into piles. You can subdivide your categories when the need to do so becomes obvious. And you can do this with anything you are dealing with, not just papers. Another tip I would suggest is to take a manageable amount out of your home, if possible. It’s psychological, but I found I could make decisions about what to keep and file or containerize much more easily when I took it outside it’s usual context, within the emotional confines of my home. Hang in there. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

  10. I take the clothes I don’t like on vacation and they don’t get to come back home. Don’t empty the closet all at once! That is a nightmare. Grab things to throw away as you walk through the house. Also when headed to a different room, grab everything in sight that goes there. Whatever, have no guilt! Just add more peace!

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